You know a song has taken over the nation when every tom, dick and Harry starts covering it. Bleeding love is seemingly the new umberella.
British singer-songwriter Jamie Scott has taken to covering it, and this video is the most watched on youtube today or something. In your face, Chris Crocker.
I've always had a bit of a soft spot for Jamie although his newer material isn't as strong as his older. Still, he has a voice to die for and a face to fuck for.
Here is his cover of bleeding love:
Thursday, 15 November 2007
Wednesday, 14 November 2007
I Need A Little Edge With My Electro Pop
You would be forgiven for not knowing Darren Hayes had a new single out this week, but he does... and it's a bit of a good un.
The second single from his fantastically epic 'This Delicate Thing We've Made' album is 'Me, Myself And (I)' and is about... well, the title sort of gives it away. It is an amazing slice of electro pop, but unfortunately looks set to chart on the more Dragonette end of the chart rather than the Robyn end.
Not content with just making a good single, the man has also done a pretty fabby video. It's quite an achievement considering he runs his own label, whereas Girls Aloud churn out shit video after shit video and thats with a major label backing them. (All the money is spent on make up. Without it, they look like rottweillers)
So here is Darren's new video. It can be summed up in two words: WOO HOO!
The second single from his fantastically epic 'This Delicate Thing We've Made' album is 'Me, Myself And (I)' and is about... well, the title sort of gives it away. It is an amazing slice of electro pop, but unfortunately looks set to chart on the more Dragonette end of the chart rather than the Robyn end.
Not content with just making a good single, the man has also done a pretty fabby video. It's quite an achievement considering he runs his own label, whereas Girls Aloud churn out shit video after shit video and thats with a major label backing them. (All the money is spent on make up. Without it, they look like rottweillers)
So here is Darren's new video. It can be summed up in two words: WOO HOO!
An X You Won't Hate
Fresh from surviving cancer, mediocrity and diminishing sales Kylie Minogue is back... and this time it's wow.
Well, at least one of the new songs is and that song is called... wow! Coinkydink? It's no surprise this song is so amazing. After all, it was written by the legendary Karen Poole who is responsible for some of the greatest pop classics this side of the Vengaboys. Here is wow as performed on the Kylie show.
If Kylie ever wants to give up the singing, she could always try out comedy, Some of the sketches from the show were pantwettingly funny:
But back to the album X. It does sound like it's going to be a bit of a corker, with other fab songs like 'No more rain' and 'The one' up there with Kylie's best. At least there will be enough songs for us gays to dance to all Christmas long!
Well, at least one of the new songs is and that song is called... wow! Coinkydink? It's no surprise this song is so amazing. After all, it was written by the legendary Karen Poole who is responsible for some of the greatest pop classics this side of the Vengaboys. Here is wow as performed on the Kylie show.
If Kylie ever wants to give up the singing, she could always try out comedy, Some of the sketches from the show were pantwettingly funny:
But back to the album X. It does sound like it's going to be a bit of a corker, with other fab songs like 'No more rain' and 'The one' up there with Kylie's best. At least there will be enough songs for us gays to dance to all Christmas long!
They Put The Gay In Factor
Finishing my x factor trilogy in a way more disappointing than threequels such as "(In Hollywood, no one can hear you say we don't want another)Scream 3", "Austin Powers in Beyoncé'smember" and "I've actually forgotten what you did last summer but I'll kill you anyway", I give you Same Difference.
Same Difference are a brother and sister duo in the same way Jack and Meg White from the White Stripes might possibly be brother and sister. Don't expect any seven nation armies from these gays though. THIS is what they do:
Jake Shears is turning in his grave (He sleeps in one)
If Disney are looking for a replacement for Vanessa Hudgens in High School Musical 3, I don't think Sarah will be getting her minge out in a hurry. Here's what they would be like... although to be fair, Disney would probably be writing a song that sounds identical to 'Breaking free' but has a different title:
And yet, I love them. I think they would have a shelf life shorter than a frozen turkey with bird flu if they won, but still. How amazing would it be if they did?
Same Difference are a brother and sister duo in the same way Jack and Meg White from the White Stripes might possibly be brother and sister. Don't expect any seven nation armies from these gays though. THIS is what they do:
Jake Shears is turning in his grave (He sleeps in one)
If Disney are looking for a replacement for Vanessa Hudgens in High School Musical 3, I don't think Sarah will be getting her minge out in a hurry. Here's what they would be like... although to be fair, Disney would probably be writing a song that sounds identical to 'Breaking free' but has a different title:
And yet, I love them. I think they would have a shelf life shorter than a frozen turkey with bird flu if they won, but still. How amazing would it be if they did?
No babies were harmed during the making of this blog
Continuing part two of my X Factor past present and future trilogy, I give you Shayne Ward. Not literally, cos he would probably jack you for your bling.
His last single featured the immortal line "I'm gonna thank your mother just for giving you birth". His new single continues the vagina popping theme with the line "If we had babies..."
Surely a man so obsessed with childbirth isn't getting any action in the sheets! (He's probably more of a woods man anyway).
Sony BMG have wisely changed the album from being a concept album called 'Babies and cunts' and have called it 'Breathless' instead which coincidentally is also the name of the new single which you can hear here...
There is a video but it hasn't made it on to youtube yet. It's probably full of placentas anyway:
He could be the UK's equivalent to Justin Timberlake... if Justin was shit.
His last single featured the immortal line "I'm gonna thank your mother just for giving you birth". His new single continues the vagina popping theme with the line "If we had babies..."
Surely a man so obsessed with childbirth isn't getting any action in the sheets! (He's probably more of a woods man anyway).
Sony BMG have wisely changed the album from being a concept album called 'Babies and cunts' and have called it 'Breathless' instead which coincidentally is also the name of the new single which you can hear here...
There is a video but it hasn't made it on to youtube yet. It's probably full of placentas anyway:
He could be the UK's equivalent to Justin Timberlake... if Justin was shit.
She's no Steve Brookstein
Let me introduce you to a little known artist called Leona Lewis. She's like Mariah Carey but with darker skin, smaller boobs (Give her a year) and bigger teeth!
She comes from Hackney which is the UK's equivalent to the Bronx - sex, drugs and chicken shops being robbed. Classy.
Her debut album is out this week and has so far sold 17 billion copies. It is on course to be the first album in history to be included in the Bible. In fact, an entire country, nay planet is to be named after Leona herself!
That's right, folks. Leona mania has taken over!
So is the album any good?
Well, it's not bad but it's hardly a classic like Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' or Michelle McManus' 'The meaning of love'.
For those of you who haven't seen it yet (All two of you), here is the video to 'Bleeding love' which in fairness is so amazing, all other singers should give up making music (I'm talking to you, Westlife)
Other songs on the album you should check out include 'Homeless' which is so beautiful, it could break the coldest person's heart... apart from homeless people who probably think Leona is a cunt; and 'Footprints in the sand' which is also pretty nifty.
This time next year, Leona will be Queen, Prime Minister and Saviour.
She comes from Hackney which is the UK's equivalent to the Bronx - sex, drugs and chicken shops being robbed. Classy.
Her debut album is out this week and has so far sold 17 billion copies. It is on course to be the first album in history to be included in the Bible. In fact, an entire country, nay planet is to be named after Leona herself!
That's right, folks. Leona mania has taken over!
So is the album any good?
Well, it's not bad but it's hardly a classic like Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' or Michelle McManus' 'The meaning of love'.
For those of you who haven't seen it yet (All two of you), here is the video to 'Bleeding love' which in fairness is so amazing, all other singers should give up making music (I'm talking to you, Westlife)
Other songs on the album you should check out include 'Homeless' which is so beautiful, it could break the coldest person's heart... apart from homeless people who probably think Leona is a cunt; and 'Footprints in the sand' which is also pretty nifty.
This time next year, Leona will be Queen, Prime Minister and Saviour.
I'm Bringing Blogging Back
Due to popular demand (one person asked), I am starting up the blog again. HOORAY!
So what happened in the 3 months since I last blogged you? Google it. Lets go to the here and now.
So what happened in the 3 months since I last blogged you? Google it. Lets go to the here and now.
Thursday, 23 August 2007
Marvellous!
Here I am resurrecting my blog from the seemingly dead world of cyberspace. I have taken a hiatus from the whole blog scene as the sight of double digit hits proved all too much for me. Normal service will be restored in the coming days, but for now an update on one of my favourite bands - Dragonette!
Their album 'Galore' is now available to buy on itunes for just over a fiver. Not bad? If you want a shiny copy to hold in your hands, you'll have to hold out a few more weeks.
And a bit of an exclusive for you. The bands third single will no longer be 'Competition' - instead fan favourite 'True believer' is getting a release. If anything is gonna save the band, this could be it. It's very Radio 2! Although any Radio 2 listeners who like the song may get a bit of a shock when they hear the album. Radio 2 isn't used to bands singing about prostitution, manbeating and general sluttiness. Here is true believer:
And here is 'Marvelous' mixed with a birrov INXS from last nights London gig. Martina gets handed some fruit halfway through the song. This may seem random, but there was a good reason for it. She was juggling them backstage beforehand:
Their album 'Galore' is now available to buy on itunes for just over a fiver. Not bad? If you want a shiny copy to hold in your hands, you'll have to hold out a few more weeks.
And a bit of an exclusive for you. The bands third single will no longer be 'Competition' - instead fan favourite 'True believer' is getting a release. If anything is gonna save the band, this could be it. It's very Radio 2! Although any Radio 2 listeners who like the song may get a bit of a shock when they hear the album. Radio 2 isn't used to bands singing about prostitution, manbeating and general sluttiness. Here is true believer:
And here is 'Marvelous' mixed with a birrov INXS from last nights London gig. Martina gets handed some fruit halfway through the song. This may seem random, but there was a good reason for it. She was juggling them backstage beforehand:
Friday, 10 August 2007
Delicate And Lovely
Well, Darren Hayes' new album has leaked on the Internet and my first impression is... it's quite good, innit!
With 25 songs, there was always the danger the album would be chock full of shit, but the good news is the majority of it is not shit!
Here are the highlights:
Me, myself and (I)
You can always tell when someone is listening to this on MSN as the (I) becomes a lightbulb. Luckily, that isn't the most exciting thing about this song. This is going to be the next single, and is funky as fuck. It should be massive!
Sing to me
We all know Darren is best loved for his beautiful ballads, and this is the best of the bunch from the new album. While 'Words' and 'I just want you to love me' are also gorgeous, this one feels like a step up from the typical ballads we currently endure from the likes of westlife. This needs to be a single!
Listen all you people
This song features lyrics such as "queens", "queers" and "phobes". Would I be wrong to suggest this is a birrova anthem in the making? The gayest thing he's done since 'Crush'(apart from get married, of course) but a million times better!
Casey
This one is the longest on the album, weighing in at over six minutes long, but it certainly doesn't grate on you and tells songs of being saved in a yellow car. Well, if you are gonna be saved it has to be a yellow car, right? Fabulous!
Add to that another 21 songs of a high quality and I think we are looking at album of the year! In your face, MIKA!
With 25 songs, there was always the danger the album would be chock full of shit, but the good news is the majority of it is not shit!
Here are the highlights:
Me, myself and (I)
You can always tell when someone is listening to this on MSN as the (I) becomes a lightbulb. Luckily, that isn't the most exciting thing about this song. This is going to be the next single, and is funky as fuck. It should be massive!
Sing to me
We all know Darren is best loved for his beautiful ballads, and this is the best of the bunch from the new album. While 'Words' and 'I just want you to love me' are also gorgeous, this one feels like a step up from the typical ballads we currently endure from the likes of westlife. This needs to be a single!
Listen all you people
This song features lyrics such as "queens", "queers" and "phobes". Would I be wrong to suggest this is a birrova anthem in the making? The gayest thing he's done since 'Crush'(apart from get married, of course) but a million times better!
Casey
This one is the longest on the album, weighing in at over six minutes long, but it certainly doesn't grate on you and tells songs of being saved in a yellow car. Well, if you are gonna be saved it has to be a yellow car, right? Fabulous!
Add to that another 21 songs of a high quality and I think we are looking at album of the year! In your face, MIKA!
It's A New Girls Aloud Video
I know what you're thinking... cue a white background with some crappy dance moves and a shot of the ginger one pouting. Well, you would only score two out of three this time as there is no white background. Exciting?
If you don't believe me, have a look for yourself:
Here are some points on the video:
It's a shame with all the sun we've been having this week that they all look so grey. You'd think they could have at least put a bit of fake tan on being the professional pop puppets they are.
Don't you just HATE it when you go out with four of your mates and they are all wearing the same outfit as you? Sucks to be one of Girls Aloud!
They don't seem too bothered about the giant pins coming out from nowhere trying to mutilate them. I suspect its Geri Halliwell warning them to not upstage her band. To be fair, there's not much chance of that.
Is it just me or has this song got very old fast? I'd go as far as to say apart from the first 30 seconds, it's a bit shit now.
If you don't believe me, have a look for yourself:
Here are some points on the video:
It's a shame with all the sun we've been having this week that they all look so grey. You'd think they could have at least put a bit of fake tan on being the professional pop puppets they are.
Don't you just HATE it when you go out with four of your mates and they are all wearing the same outfit as you? Sucks to be one of Girls Aloud!
They don't seem too bothered about the giant pins coming out from nowhere trying to mutilate them. I suspect its Geri Halliwell warning them to not upstage her band. To be fair, there's not much chance of that.
Is it just me or has this song got very old fast? I'd go as far as to say apart from the first 30 seconds, it's a bit shit now.
Friday, 3 August 2007
Stop The Presses
Westlife sent THIS email to everyone on their mailing list today. I have no idea why I am on their mailing list, but it went to my junk mail anyway which means normality is restored:
It’s exciting news this week, as we can reveal that the boys have started work on a brand new album…
Start working? What input do the boys actually have? No doubt starting work means having a wanking contest to see who gets their face closest to the camera for the album cover.
At last, the news we’ve all been waiting for… After some well-earned holiday time, Shane, Nicky, Kian and Mark have gone back into the studio to begin recording a new studio album.
Well-earned holiday time? Shoulda sent them to Iraq.
They’ll be working with some of the biggest names in studio production, including Steve Mac, Quiz/Larossi, Per + David, Jorgen Elofsson and Maratone (Rami, Anthor + Savan), before jetting off to shoot the video for single #1 at the end of August.
Well, I may be stupid but I've never heard of any of those people. Not exactly Max Martin or LA Reid, is it? Thankfully, they aren't working with Timbaland.
The fact they are going to shoot a video for the first single weeks after STARTING the album suggests that recording a Westlife album isn't the hard slog we all expected it to be.
We’ll be keeping you up to date with all the latest news on how recording is going, but meanwhile, why not head over to the westlife.com forum, and swap ideas with other fans about what we can expect from the new album?
Well, why the hell not?
Here is what they have to say:
"Its great news & if there are a couple of covers thrown in Im not too bothered"
A couple? Make that 10 covers and one original, love.
Some of the fans have taken it onto themselves to find out where the recording studio is:
"It would be cool to know - then we can all head over there."
Great idea! We can bomb them to hell!
So yes. New Westlife album coming this year. Great news.
At least we all know what to get our grandparents!
It’s exciting news this week, as we can reveal that the boys have started work on a brand new album…
Start working? What input do the boys actually have? No doubt starting work means having a wanking contest to see who gets their face closest to the camera for the album cover.
At last, the news we’ve all been waiting for… After some well-earned holiday time, Shane, Nicky, Kian and Mark have gone back into the studio to begin recording a new studio album.
Well-earned holiday time? Shoulda sent them to Iraq.
They’ll be working with some of the biggest names in studio production, including Steve Mac, Quiz/Larossi, Per + David, Jorgen Elofsson and Maratone (Rami, Anthor + Savan), before jetting off to shoot the video for single #1 at the end of August.
Well, I may be stupid but I've never heard of any of those people. Not exactly Max Martin or LA Reid, is it? Thankfully, they aren't working with Timbaland.
The fact they are going to shoot a video for the first single weeks after STARTING the album suggests that recording a Westlife album isn't the hard slog we all expected it to be.
We’ll be keeping you up to date with all the latest news on how recording is going, but meanwhile, why not head over to the westlife.com forum, and swap ideas with other fans about what we can expect from the new album?
Well, why the hell not?
Here is what they have to say:
"Its great news & if there are a couple of covers thrown in Im not too bothered"
A couple? Make that 10 covers and one original, love.
Some of the fans have taken it onto themselves to find out where the recording studio is:
"It would be cool to know - then we can all head over there."
Great idea! We can bomb them to hell!
So yes. New Westlife album coming this year. Great news.
At least we all know what to get our grandparents!
Like Silver But Not As Shiny
I've introduced you to the shit of the crop in the current pop climate. Now lets meet someone decent.
This is Ross Copperman.
People expected big things of him... They never happened.
Perhaps things will pick up with his new single 'Found you'
Probably not, but that doesn't stop it being very good indeed.
Here it is, for your viewing pleasure:
He supported Rogue Traders last year. Can you see why?
No, me neither.
This is Ross Copperman.
People expected big things of him... They never happened.
Perhaps things will pick up with his new single 'Found you'
Probably not, but that doesn't stop it being very good indeed.
Here it is, for your viewing pleasure:
He supported Rogue Traders last year. Can you see why?
No, me neither.
Cock And Roll
Meet Amy MacDonald. She's 12 or something about it. She looks like Avril Lavigne after a bath. She is also shit.
So why the fuck is her album heading for the top three this week? Just when my faith in the British public is restored after getting rid of ella bitch, you go and buy something like this?
Why do I dislike Miss Burger King so? Maybe it's the fact that she is Scottish but sounds Irish when she sings. Perhaps she's auditioning for the proclaimers or something. Truth is, she's not even good enough to be a one woman B*Witched. But why does she do it? She's either deranged, deformed, dyslexic or just a div! I was almost expecting her to do a jig halfway through the song.
Here is her video. Remember, if you're tempted to throw old fruit at the screen. It won't actually hit her, and will just leave you with a bit of a mess.
Still, it will leave you with a sense of satisfaction... moreso than listening to this pile of shit would normally do:
So why the fuck is her album heading for the top three this week? Just when my faith in the British public is restored after getting rid of ella bitch, you go and buy something like this?
Why do I dislike Miss Burger King so? Maybe it's the fact that she is Scottish but sounds Irish when she sings. Perhaps she's auditioning for the proclaimers or something. Truth is, she's not even good enough to be a one woman B*Witched. But why does she do it? She's either deranged, deformed, dyslexic or just a div! I was almost expecting her to do a jig halfway through the song.
Here is her video. Remember, if you're tempted to throw old fruit at the screen. It won't actually hit her, and will just leave you with a bit of a mess.
Still, it will leave you with a sense of satisfaction... moreso than listening to this pile of shit would normally do:
Sunday, 29 July 2007
Even Her Song Titles Are Boring
Katie Melua is BACK!
With her third album! Count it!
Can you believe people buy this shit?
Anyway, the most boring person in pop is releasing a new album called 'Pictures', which will no doubt be bought by the masses of people with no taste. These are the people who paint their living room beige, and have a picture of a goldfish as their screensaver.
The first single from the album is called... 'If you were a sailboat'. I actually despair. I thought eight billion tampons or whatever it was called was bad, but this. Jesus!
Here is the album cover. Even she looks bored!
The album also contains a song called 'What it says on the tin'. In that case, the album should really be called 'Bland tripe from some bint with a voice like death'.
Katie Melua is the musical equivalent of cynaide.
I shall end this blog with this thought:
If Katie Melua was a sailboat, I would blow a hole in her and sink the bitch.
With her third album! Count it!
Can you believe people buy this shit?
Anyway, the most boring person in pop is releasing a new album called 'Pictures', which will no doubt be bought by the masses of people with no taste. These are the people who paint their living room beige, and have a picture of a goldfish as their screensaver.
The first single from the album is called... 'If you were a sailboat'. I actually despair. I thought eight billion tampons or whatever it was called was bad, but this. Jesus!
Here is the album cover. Even she looks bored!
The album also contains a song called 'What it says on the tin'. In that case, the album should really be called 'Bland tripe from some bint with a voice like death'.
Katie Melua is the musical equivalent of cynaide.
I shall end this blog with this thought:
If Katie Melua was a sailboat, I would blow a hole in her and sink the bitch.
Her Voice Will Go On
And on and on and on...
Rumours are abound that Celine Dion is working with Timbaland on her new album.
Yes, the bitch is back and this time... she's urban!
I did repeatedly check the calendar to make sure it wasn't April Fools day, but it looks like this could be true.
In that case, I'd like to remind you what happened last time Celine tried to be "cool"
May God have mercy on us all.
It might be time to invest in a nice pair of earmuffs, or alternatively cut off your ears. It's still better than the alternative!
Rumours are abound that Celine Dion is working with Timbaland on her new album.
Yes, the bitch is back and this time... she's urban!
I did repeatedly check the calendar to make sure it wasn't April Fools day, but it looks like this could be true.
In that case, I'd like to remind you what happened last time Celine tried to be "cool"
May God have mercy on us all.
It might be time to invest in a nice pair of earmuffs, or alternatively cut off your ears. It's still better than the alternative!
Kissed Off
I have returned from the second of my stints in the crotch of Scissor Sisters. This time, I have more than photos for your arousement. I got my camera out and filmed the fuckers!
So here are three reasons why Scissor Sisters are the most awesome band on the planet.
1. They dance like gays
2. They simulate anal sex on stage despite the fact there are kids in the audience who will ask "Mummy, why's he sticking it in there?"
3. They give amazing performances of amazing songs, as well as walking into spotlights causing the camera to portray said artist as Jesus Christ
So yes, Scissor Sisters = Amazingness. Agreed?
To those of you who will reply to this with "Madonna did it first". What hasn't the slut done? I mean come on. She's adopted half the planet, caused global warming, attempted to cure global warming, and fucked the entire male population of the entertainment industry. Actually... females too.
So here are three reasons why Scissor Sisters are the most awesome band on the planet.
1. They dance like gays
2. They simulate anal sex on stage despite the fact there are kids in the audience who will ask "Mummy, why's he sticking it in there?"
3. They give amazing performances of amazing songs, as well as walking into spotlights causing the camera to portray said artist as Jesus Christ
So yes, Scissor Sisters = Amazingness. Agreed?
To those of you who will reply to this with "Madonna did it first". What hasn't the slut done? I mean come on. She's adopted half the planet, caused global warming, attempted to cure global warming, and fucked the entire male population of the entertainment industry. Actually... females too.
At Least It's not 118
Unfortunately Dragonette failed to get their second top 100 hit this week, instead they settled for number 112. You may think this is a bad thing, so here are some reasons why getting to number 112 is better than getting to number one:
1. 112 is the name of an American group who had hits with 'Peaches and cream' and, erm... thats about it
2. 112 is an emergency number you can use on your phone, like 999... or 911 if you are in Amayoreeca
3. 911 is also the name of a group, although they are not American... or decent
4. 112 is easy to remember
So congratulations to Dragonette!
Other news in the chart this week:
- Groove Armada got their second top ten hit EVER with 'Song 4 Mutya'. Woulda been their first number one if they hadn't have made such a shit video or waited ten months to release the cunt
- MIKA got a top ten hit with his song about women with a bit of jelly in their hump. People probably bought it after seeing 'Hairspray' in the cinema
- People realised 'Umbrella' is shit
1. 112 is the name of an American group who had hits with 'Peaches and cream' and, erm... thats about it
2. 112 is an emergency number you can use on your phone, like 999... or 911 if you are in Amayoreeca
3. 911 is also the name of a group, although they are not American... or decent
4. 112 is easy to remember
So congratulations to Dragonette!
Other news in the chart this week:
- Groove Armada got their second top ten hit EVER with 'Song 4 Mutya'. Woulda been their first number one if they hadn't have made such a shit video or waited ten months to release the cunt
- MIKA got a top ten hit with his song about women with a bit of jelly in their hump. People probably bought it after seeing 'Hairspray' in the cinema
- People realised 'Umbrella' is shit
It Didn't Even Make It To December
My sympathies go out to Kelly Clarkson who has seen her new album 'My December' scrapped barely a month after its release.
To be fair, the project was doomed from the start. Perhaps she should have listened to Clive Davis when he warned her her new material was, in actual fact, a pile of dung.
As a Kelly fan, I didn't let Clive's comments deter me so bought the album anyway. I don't regret it! I needed a new coaster.
So yes, bye bye My December. Hello, Album number four - due next year. Will it be called 'My 2008'? Here are my suggestions for some titles:
My Year From Hell
(Since) My Individuality (been gone)
My Shit
Ms. Kelly... no, the other one
However, the most likely title will be 'My Greatest Hits'
My December
2007-2007
Fuck off
Kelly Clarkson's career
2002-2007
R.I.P
To be fair, the project was doomed from the start. Perhaps she should have listened to Clive Davis when he warned her her new material was, in actual fact, a pile of dung.
As a Kelly fan, I didn't let Clive's comments deter me so bought the album anyway. I don't regret it! I needed a new coaster.
So yes, bye bye My December. Hello, Album number four - due next year. Will it be called 'My 2008'? Here are my suggestions for some titles:
My Year From Hell
(Since) My Individuality (been gone)
My Shit
Ms. Kelly... no, the other one
However, the most likely title will be 'My Greatest Hits'
My December
2007-2007
Fuck off
Kelly Clarkson's career
2002-2007
R.I.P
Friday, 27 July 2007
They Get Around
I'm not going to make a regular habit of posting mp3s here, but considering this is just a bit of fun intended to be spread around like an STD, here are Dragonette with their own unique take on Calvin Harris' 'The Girls', cleverly called 'The Boys'
Clicky
And here is the cover to the album. Their artwork makes me bulge:
Clicky
And here is the cover to the album. Their artwork makes me bulge:
Only In The Scissorhood
Who else would give a blow job to a microphone while singing?
It could only be Jake Shears! Behold:
In short, Scissors at the O2 was fucking amazing! 9 songs from each album - they must realise nobody likes 'Ta dah' much!
The stage was in the shape of their scissor logo, including a "crotch pit" between the two legs, which of course I was in. And here is my rather hyper rather sweaty visual review of the whole thing:
Scissor Sisters Crotch Pit Madness
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I could be a TV presenter.
It could only be Jake Shears! Behold:
In short, Scissors at the O2 was fucking amazing! 9 songs from each album - they must realise nobody likes 'Ta dah' much!
The stage was in the shape of their scissor logo, including a "crotch pit" between the two legs, which of course I was in. And here is my rather hyper rather sweaty visual review of the whole thing:
Scissor Sisters Crotch Pit Madness
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I could be a TV presenter.
Thursday, 26 July 2007
Best Promotional Item Ever?
These, my friends, are Dragonette condoms.
As you can see, you have a choice of three - each reflecting song titles from their fucking fantastic album 'Galore'. However, people may not be encouraged to have sexual relations with you if you whip out a condom stating 'I get around' so it might be best to go for the 'You please me' one?
Amazing.
Other popstars should take note and release condoms with their own song titles on it, like so:
P!nk: "U + Ur Hand"
Lily Allen: "Not Big"
Shakira: "Don't Bother"
Natalie Imbruglia: "Big Mistake", "Torn"
As you can see, you have a choice of three - each reflecting song titles from their fucking fantastic album 'Galore'. However, people may not be encouraged to have sexual relations with you if you whip out a condom stating 'I get around' so it might be best to go for the 'You please me' one?
Amazing.
Other popstars should take note and release condoms with their own song titles on it, like so:
P!nk: "U + Ur Hand"
Lily Allen: "Not Big"
Shakira: "Don't Bother"
Natalie Imbruglia: "Big Mistake", "Torn"
Tuesday, 24 July 2007
There Is A God!
Rihanna looks like she's going to be dethroned this week. Shame really. The fact she was number one for ten weeks was showing what a joke the singles chart is at the moment.
So what else can we expect from the charts this week?
* Dragonette look set to get their second top 100 single this year. However, they may miss out on the top 90 for the second time this year!
* MIKA's ode to obesity might miss the top ten. But people are still buying his album so he won't need to join the dole just yet!
* The Manic Street Preachers are still churning out music and are being rewarded with a top three placing. Erm, why?
* People aren't sick of Timbaland yet.
* Or Kate Nash for that matter.
All this leads to one conclusion: The charts are a pile of wank!
So what else can we expect from the charts this week?
* Dragonette look set to get their second top 100 single this year. However, they may miss out on the top 90 for the second time this year!
* MIKA's ode to obesity might miss the top ten. But people are still buying his album so he won't need to join the dole just yet!
* The Manic Street Preachers are still churning out music and are being rewarded with a top three placing. Erm, why?
* People aren't sick of Timbaland yet.
* Or Kate Nash for that matter.
All this leads to one conclusion: The charts are a pile of wank!
All The Lost Cunts
This is James Blunt's new album cover:
I don't need to say much apart from... it doesn't really work, does it? When people buy James Blunt CDs, they want a picture of his feet or him serenading an ayn-gel on a train. Not a collage of millions of pictures of the minger which turn into a giant picture of the cunt.
It also begs the question - With all the billions of pounds he has made from his overrated debut album, why hasn't he invested in a razor? Either to shave or slit his wrists. Both would be doing us a favour.
As for his new single '1973', the jury is still out. I was hoping it was going to be his own interpretation of Estelle's '1980' but alas, it isn't.
I don't need to say much apart from... it doesn't really work, does it? When people buy James Blunt CDs, they want a picture of his feet or him serenading an ayn-gel on a train. Not a collage of millions of pictures of the minger which turn into a giant picture of the cunt.
It also begs the question - With all the billions of pounds he has made from his overrated debut album, why hasn't he invested in a razor? Either to shave or slit his wrists. Both would be doing us a favour.
As for his new single '1973', the jury is still out. I was hoping it was going to be his own interpretation of Estelle's '1980' but alas, it isn't.
Gloriously Emo
Here is the cover to Natalie Imbruglia's forthcoming "hits" collection:
It looks she is trying to create a haircut as emo as Rihanna's, except it doesn't really work, does it?
Calling your greatest hits album 'Glorious' when most people would only be able to name two singles off the top of their head is a bit much, don't you think? I'd have called it "Prematurely Released: The Singles" or "You may only know torn but you'll probably like wrong impression as well: The Singles"
And here is the full video for her gloriously titled new single 'Glorious'
Things to note:
1. I may be wrong, but I was under the impression that Frith Street was in the heart of London and was surrounded by dodgy backstreets featuring scantily clad women and many homosexuals. Apparently not. Frith Street is in a desert with cactuses. Hmmm.
2. Her hair looks less emo in the video and more lesbian.
3. There's a guy who looks like Tom Cruise in the video. Perhaps he is trying to recruit Nat into his cult of scientology... or just impregnate her with his midget sperm.
4. The fact that Natalie isn't walking during the "Keep walking" verse is a wasted opportunity
5. She has a sexy back
6. The sparks coming out of the drum kit are slightly scary
This is still my song of the summer.
It looks she is trying to create a haircut as emo as Rihanna's, except it doesn't really work, does it?
Calling your greatest hits album 'Glorious' when most people would only be able to name two singles off the top of their head is a bit much, don't you think? I'd have called it "Prematurely Released: The Singles" or "You may only know torn but you'll probably like wrong impression as well: The Singles"
And here is the full video for her gloriously titled new single 'Glorious'
Things to note:
1. I may be wrong, but I was under the impression that Frith Street was in the heart of London and was surrounded by dodgy backstreets featuring scantily clad women and many homosexuals. Apparently not. Frith Street is in a desert with cactuses. Hmmm.
2. Her hair looks less emo in the video and more lesbian.
3. There's a guy who looks like Tom Cruise in the video. Perhaps he is trying to recruit Nat into his cult of scientology... or just impregnate her with his midget sperm.
4. The fact that Natalie isn't walking during the "Keep walking" verse is a wasted opportunity
5. She has a sexy back
6. The sparks coming out of the drum kit are slightly scary
This is still my song of the summer.
Rocking Robyn
The future of music lies in this woman's hands.
She is Robyn and she has come to save us from the mediocrity associated with pop music.
Those of you that have not heard her self-titled album are missing out on a modern classic. It was released 100 years ago in Sweden and was given a soft release in the UK earlier this year. However, due to the impending massive success of 'With every heartbeat', she has made a deal with Island to give her a push in the UK.
This time next year, she will be the new Britney... only with hair and talent.
Here are two reasons to love Robyn:
With Every Heartbeat
Be Mine!
Anyone living in the London area is advised to get tickets for her September show at Bush Hall pronto... if only to see me dancing like a megapoof at the front.
She is Robyn and she has come to save us from the mediocrity associated with pop music.
Those of you that have not heard her self-titled album are missing out on a modern classic. It was released 100 years ago in Sweden and was given a soft release in the UK earlier this year. However, due to the impending massive success of 'With every heartbeat', she has made a deal with Island to give her a push in the UK.
This time next year, she will be the new Britney... only with hair and talent.
Here are two reasons to love Robyn:
With Every Heartbeat
Be Mine!
Anyone living in the London area is advised to get tickets for her September show at Bush Hall pronto... if only to see me dancing like a megapoof at the front.
Monday, 23 July 2007
Take It To The Till
If you only buy one thing this week, let it be this:
That is the amazing new single from the amazing band Dragonette.
You may have never seen it on TV. It's not hard to see why really, is it?
That doesn't take away from the songs brilliance though!
It is out in all good record stores today, and by that I mean HMV and Virgin as there are no other record stores that sell singles anymore.
If you buy more than one thing this week, you may also want to invest in the new singles by MIKA (I'm tipping him for big things) and Feist. Also, some food so you don't, like, starve to death!
That is the amazing new single from the amazing band Dragonette.
You may have never seen it on TV. It's not hard to see why really, is it?
That doesn't take away from the songs brilliance though!
It is out in all good record stores today, and by that I mean HMV and Virgin as there are no other record stores that sell singles anymore.
If you buy more than one thing this week, you may also want to invest in the new singles by MIKA (I'm tipping him for big things) and Feist. Also, some food so you don't, like, starve to death!
Same Ego, Different Facial Hair
This is the most ridiculous thing you will see or hear this year, and it comes courtesy of Usher and R. Kelly who have come together in support of every urban stars favourite charity... booty.
The song reminds me of a male version of 'the boy is mine' - however the difference between the two is obvious. 'The boy is mine' was amazing. This... is not.
It seems the two *stars* forgot to create a tune to go with their self promoting lyrics. You can almost hear them unzip their trousers at the end and get a ruler out.
Over-indulgent tosh:
Another thing I noticed. For someone who is meant to be a massive ladies man/homosexual/paedophile (All have been rumoured, only one can be correct), how come Kell's only has four numbers on his phone? Even I have more than that and I've never had a number one single.
The answer is simple. The real money is in blogging, not singing!
The song reminds me of a male version of 'the boy is mine' - however the difference between the two is obvious. 'The boy is mine' was amazing. This... is not.
It seems the two *stars* forgot to create a tune to go with their self promoting lyrics. You can almost hear them unzip their trousers at the end and get a ruler out.
Over-indulgent tosh:
Another thing I noticed. For someone who is meant to be a massive ladies man/homosexual/paedophile (All have been rumoured, only one can be correct), how come Kell's only has four numbers on his phone? Even I have more than that and I've never had a number one single.
The answer is simple. The real money is in blogging, not singing!
Please Don't Stop THIS Music
However, 'Umbrella' can still fuck off.
Even though 'Shut up and drive' is nowhere near ready to come out in the UK, the video for her third single 'Don't Stop The Music' has premiered. Exciting, no?
If you click this, it will magically play inside this blog as if it were magic! Imagine Harry Potter grabbing his wand and shouting YOUTUBARIA!
Things to note in the order they appear:
1. She gets out of the cab without PAYING! What a rebel!
2. Amy Winehouse appears to have shared a cab with her. This explains the rebellious streak Rihanna has begun!
3. Rihanna looks at a kid in a shop while wearing dark glasses and then tells him to be quiet. Hmmm. Listen Rihanna, love. Just cos the song samples Michael Jackson doesn't mean you have to do EVERYTHING he does!
4. Look at the complex clap she does! Not just a pretty face, is she? Well... not just a face.
5. Nothing much exciting happens after the first 30 seconds. She claps some more... well, a lot more and rearranges her breasts. Amazing.
The Rihanna clap is the new Cha-Cha Slide!
And for those of you who haven't seen it, here is the video for 'Shut up and drive'. This video features the most incredible two seconds ever to be seen in any video EVER. This is the moment where she slams down the car bonnet. For me, this is the peak of her career. She will never be able to recreate that moment, no matter how amazing her hair is.
They don't wear clothes like that in the garages I've been to!
Even though 'Shut up and drive' is nowhere near ready to come out in the UK, the video for her third single 'Don't Stop The Music' has premiered. Exciting, no?
If you click this, it will magically play inside this blog as if it were magic! Imagine Harry Potter grabbing his wand and shouting YOUTUBARIA!
Things to note in the order they appear:
1. She gets out of the cab without PAYING! What a rebel!
2. Amy Winehouse appears to have shared a cab with her. This explains the rebellious streak Rihanna has begun!
3. Rihanna looks at a kid in a shop while wearing dark glasses and then tells him to be quiet. Hmmm. Listen Rihanna, love. Just cos the song samples Michael Jackson doesn't mean you have to do EVERYTHING he does!
4. Look at the complex clap she does! Not just a pretty face, is she? Well... not just a face.
5. Nothing much exciting happens after the first 30 seconds. She claps some more... well, a lot more and rearranges her breasts. Amazing.
The Rihanna clap is the new Cha-Cha Slide!
And for those of you who haven't seen it, here is the video for 'Shut up and drive'. This video features the most incredible two seconds ever to be seen in any video EVER. This is the moment where she slams down the car bonnet. For me, this is the peak of her career. She will never be able to recreate that moment, no matter how amazing her hair is.
They don't wear clothes like that in the garages I've been to!
I Blame Rihanna
... for all of life's problems, but especially due to the floods and torrential rain gripping the UK at the moment. Have you noticed how the weather has got progressively shitter since 'Umbrella' has been number one?
TEN FUCKING WEEKS NOW!
Who the hell is still buying it? I mean, Jesus! If you want to listen to the song, download it illegally.
I'm obviously not the only one fucked off with 'Umbrella' as 'Shut up and drive' debuted in the top 75 this week on downloads.
Other exciting events in the charts this week... Erm... Fuck all!
TEN FUCKING WEEKS NOW!
Who the hell is still buying it? I mean, Jesus! If you want to listen to the song, download it illegally.
I'm obviously not the only one fucked off with 'Umbrella' as 'Shut up and drive' debuted in the top 75 this week on downloads.
Other exciting events in the charts this week... Erm... Fuck all!
Sunday, 22 July 2007
No. Just no...
Below are Girls Aloud performing their new single 'Sexy! No No No..." (An English teachers dream) at todays T4 on the beach (The gay Glastonbury). I won't go on about the song as I did that on Friday. Instead, I shall comment on the choreography... or lack of it.
To me, it seems like Cheryl (Bitch Spice?) came up with one "move" five minutes before they went on stage. Even that doesn't justify the pure shitness of this.
It has to be seen to be believed!
I've seen Il Divo move better than this!
To me, it seems like Cheryl (Bitch Spice?) came up with one "move" five minutes before they went on stage. Even that doesn't justify the pure shitness of this.
It has to be seen to be believed!
I've seen Il Divo move better than this!
Friday, 20 July 2007
I'm Fake
Another person making a long awaited (?) return to music this summer is J.Lo. Sorry, we mustn't call her that anymore. Diva's orders! After an English album no one gave a fuck about and a Spanish album no one gave a fuck about, J.Diddy is trying out another language, though I'll be fucked if I can work out what it is. All I know is it sounds quite shit. Have a listen:
So good, it could have been on 'Rebirth'
Oh, J.Judd. When will you just get on with it and do another 'Love Don't Cost A Thing' (which was a lie anyway)
So good, it could have been on 'Rebirth'
Oh, J.Judd. When will you just get on with it and do another 'Love Don't Cost A Thing' (which was a lie anyway)
That's One Way To Kill A Party
Here is Dame Shirley Bassey's take on P!nk's 'Get The Party Started'
Here are some points:
1. The laugh the Dame does on "kissing my arse" is so cringeworthily awful, it should be in the new Shayne Ward single
2. I bet the Queen is regretting giving her a "Dame" title now
3. Is it just me, or has her skin got darker? She's like the Anti-Jacko
4. Do you think anyone's told her what the song is ACTUALLY about?
Remember, this isn't just any past-it diva bitch, this is Marks & Spencer's past-it diva bitch!
Here are some points:
1. The laugh the Dame does on "kissing my arse" is so cringeworthily awful, it should be in the new Shayne Ward single
2. I bet the Queen is regretting giving her a "Dame" title now
3. Is it just me, or has her skin got darker? She's like the Anti-Jacko
4. Do you think anyone's told her what the song is ACTUALLY about?
Remember, this isn't just any past-it diva bitch, this is Marks & Spencer's past-it diva bitch!
The Magic Positions
I had the pleasure of seeing Patrick Wolf supporting MIKA at Somerset House on Tuesday night. I will be doing a review of the entire gig later this evening, but for now here is Patrick in various stages of undress on stage.
It's not every day you go to a show where children witness a gay man with funny hair stripping to his pants (unless you go to see Joseph, of course)
1. Fully clothed... with your belt undone. Look at the expression on the cellists face. He's just glad he has that cello covering his...
2. Doing the funky chicken while wearing a suitable amount of clothes. Erm, Pat... your pants are showing
3. Is this amount of nudity legal outdoors in central London?
Patrick posted a bulletin after the gig saying "MIKA is a twat". One would assume the curly haired one wouldn't give Patrick oral sex and now the Wolfman is bitter.
It's not every day you go to a show where children witness a gay man with funny hair stripping to his pants (unless you go to see Joseph, of course)
1. Fully clothed... with your belt undone. Look at the expression on the cellists face. He's just glad he has that cello covering his...
2. Doing the funky chicken while wearing a suitable amount of clothes. Erm, Pat... your pants are showing
3. Is this amount of nudity legal outdoors in central London?
Patrick posted a bulletin after the gig saying "MIKA is a twat". One would assume the curly haired one wouldn't give Patrick oral sex and now the Wolfman is bitter.
Sexology
Everyone's favourite girlband are back! No, not the Spice Girls. I'm talking about those other five girls: Party Spice, WAG Spice, Non entity spice, Soon-to-be-solo Spice and, erm... Ginger Spice! They are more commonly known as "Them girls that didn't get in Clea" although some like to call them Girls Aloud!
After releasing about seventy eight covers in a row, Girls Aloud are back with an original song! We shouldn't give the girls too much credit. It's not as if they actually write anything. They just shag Hollywood hunks into rehab, marry footballers who aren't David Beckham, or test out various shades of ginger on their hair. To be fair, this is still an achievement. Would anyone give a shit if they were ugly?
Enough on the girls' "personalities" (I use that word lightly). As any pop fanatic knows, it's the music that counts... as well as the countless tabloid stories to ensure people know they actually have a single coming out.
The new single is called 'Sexy! No No No...'. As you can tell from the title, the girls have graduated from their biology classes and have moved on to English. Yes, folks! They have learnt how to punctuate and they want to shout it from the rooftops! Next, they'll learn how to spell.
Apart from an intro that reminds me of Corona's 'Rhythm of the night', it's pretty good. Note the use of the word "pretty" - this does not mean OMGZ IT IZ DA BESTEST FING EVA. Doesn't make a blind bit of difference though. The girls could fart their way through three minutes of music and all the gays would cum at the sound of it.
Check it out yourself. Note: This is NOT the video, although it does look as expensive as their videos usually are:
After releasing about seventy eight covers in a row, Girls Aloud are back with an original song! We shouldn't give the girls too much credit. It's not as if they actually write anything. They just shag Hollywood hunks into rehab, marry footballers who aren't David Beckham, or test out various shades of ginger on their hair. To be fair, this is still an achievement. Would anyone give a shit if they were ugly?
Enough on the girls' "personalities" (I use that word lightly). As any pop fanatic knows, it's the music that counts... as well as the countless tabloid stories to ensure people know they actually have a single coming out.
The new single is called 'Sexy! No No No...'. As you can tell from the title, the girls have graduated from their biology classes and have moved on to English. Yes, folks! They have learnt how to punctuate and they want to shout it from the rooftops! Next, they'll learn how to spell.
Apart from an intro that reminds me of Corona's 'Rhythm of the night', it's pretty good. Note the use of the word "pretty" - this does not mean OMGZ IT IZ DA BESTEST FING EVA. Doesn't make a blind bit of difference though. The girls could fart their way through three minutes of music and all the gays would cum at the sound of it.
Check it out yourself. Note: This is NOT the video, although it does look as expensive as their videos usually are:
Thursday, 19 July 2007
What A Load Of Old Sh...ayne!
Shayne Ward is BACK! Did you miss him? Go on. Did you?
Shayne is hoping to repeat the success of his X Factor predecessor Steve Brookstein by ACTUALLY releasing a second album. If it charts in the top 75, he will be the most successful X Factor contestant EVER!
But lets not get ahead of ourselves. There's still the single to come. It is called 'If that's ok with you' and features the worst lyrics in pop since the Cheeky Girls released their Ivor Novello winning 'Cheeky Flamenco'
As for the style of music, it is clear that Shayne has been taking lessons from Jamelia in "How to alienate your fanbase"
Obviously Louis Walsh has been bumming the right people as he has persuaded someone to actually let Shayne make a video that cost more than £5. There were rumours that Shayne "accidentally" threw a midget in the pool in this video. However, the lack of midgets present in this video makes me think it was either a lie, or that the midget is now dead and all scenes related to said midget have been cut so Shayne can avoid spending time in prison with the rest of his family.
Things to bear in mind before you attempt to watch this amazing work of art
1. Despite what he may think, he is NOT, repeat NOT Justin Timberlake
2. He is also not the British equivalent of Justin Timberlake
3. If he was Bolivian, he would not be the Bolivian equivalent of Justin Timberlake. I do not know any Bolivian artists, but I am sure there is at least one person more capable of being Justin that Shayne is
4. He looks like a rapist in the video
5. Admittedly a rapist who can dance
6. He is dancing inappropriately... like a rapist
So here we go!
OK with you?
Shayne is hoping to repeat the success of his X Factor predecessor Steve Brookstein by ACTUALLY releasing a second album. If it charts in the top 75, he will be the most successful X Factor contestant EVER!
But lets not get ahead of ourselves. There's still the single to come. It is called 'If that's ok with you' and features the worst lyrics in pop since the Cheeky Girls released their Ivor Novello winning 'Cheeky Flamenco'
As for the style of music, it is clear that Shayne has been taking lessons from Jamelia in "How to alienate your fanbase"
Obviously Louis Walsh has been bumming the right people as he has persuaded someone to actually let Shayne make a video that cost more than £5. There were rumours that Shayne "accidentally" threw a midget in the pool in this video. However, the lack of midgets present in this video makes me think it was either a lie, or that the midget is now dead and all scenes related to said midget have been cut so Shayne can avoid spending time in prison with the rest of his family.
Things to bear in mind before you attempt to watch this amazing work of art
1. Despite what he may think, he is NOT, repeat NOT Justin Timberlake
2. He is also not the British equivalent of Justin Timberlake
3. If he was Bolivian, he would not be the Bolivian equivalent of Justin Timberlake. I do not know any Bolivian artists, but I am sure there is at least one person more capable of being Justin that Shayne is
4. He looks like a rapist in the video
5. Admittedly a rapist who can dance
6. He is dancing inappropriately... like a rapist
So here we go!
OK with you?
Gloriously Joyful
Well, strike me down with a kangaroo testicle, it's the return of everyone's favourite Neighbours pop starlet who isn't Kylie Minogue... that Natalie bird whose surname no one can spell.
After ten years in the music industry, she has decided to release a greatest hits collection.
I say SHE has decided. One would assume someone from her record company said something along these lines:
"'Ere love, your last album may have got to number one and all, but it didn't make much money for us. So erm... lets release a greatest hits or you can fuck off home"
Despite only releasing nine singles, which is an average of less than one a year, Natalie's 'Glorious: The Singles' hits the shelves in September, and will be in bargain buckets everywhere by Christmas.
Don't get me wrong, I do love Natalie. She has the ability to make music so joyful, all you want to do is wear a tank top and pretend its the '80s again, as well as make music that is so depressingly beautiful, you just want to cry forever realising the '80s are over. This whole thing just screams "pointless", don'tcha think?
Thankfully,she has decided to go for the former for her new single 'Glorious'... and what a result it is! Even though we are in the middle of floods, earthquakes and whatever else Mother Nature chooses to throw at us in these summer months, this effort from Nat makes you forget your troubles and want to go sunbathing despite the potential risk of drowning in the rain.
Here is a clip of the video:
I'm calling this "Song of the summer" after Mutyamarda's 'Song 4 Mutya' has begun to grate on me!
After ten years in the music industry, she has decided to release a greatest hits collection.
I say SHE has decided. One would assume someone from her record company said something along these lines:
"'Ere love, your last album may have got to number one and all, but it didn't make much money for us. So erm... lets release a greatest hits or you can fuck off home"
Despite only releasing nine singles, which is an average of less than one a year, Natalie's 'Glorious: The Singles' hits the shelves in September, and will be in bargain buckets everywhere by Christmas.
Don't get me wrong, I do love Natalie. She has the ability to make music so joyful, all you want to do is wear a tank top and pretend its the '80s again, as well as make music that is so depressingly beautiful, you just want to cry forever realising the '80s are over. This whole thing just screams "pointless", don'tcha think?
Thankfully,she has decided to go for the former for her new single 'Glorious'... and what a result it is! Even though we are in the middle of floods, earthquakes and whatever else Mother Nature chooses to throw at us in these summer months, this effort from Nat makes you forget your troubles and want to go sunbathing despite the potential risk of drowning in the rain.
Here is a clip of the video:
I'm calling this "Song of the summer" after Mutyamarda's 'Song 4 Mutya' has begun to grate on me!
On The Verge Of Amazingness
The first thing I have chosen to ramble about is Darren Hayes comeback. I use that word lightly, as while this may be his first album since his departure with Sony BMG a while ago, he has never really had any failure as a solo artist. Since leaving Savage Garden, he has seen all of his UK released singles venture inside the top 20. True, his last album 'The Tension and the Spark' underperformed tragically, but I put that down to the UK record buying public not knowing a decent record if it slapped them in the face and said "Stop listening to that shit. It's as original as Westlife!".
Even though Darren uses the concept of time machines in songs from his new album, lets escape the past and concentrate on the future - namely Darren's forthcoming 25 track opus 'This Delicate Thing We've Made'. The first single from it is the joyfully titled 'On The Verge Of Something Wonderful' - the video for which you can see below:
Who else could write unique and quirky
lyrics such as "A trip to the dentist, the Hollywood black list"?
This is just one of the gems on what looks certain to be a collection of Darren's strongest material to date! From the nine songs I've heard so far, standouts are the epic sounding 'How To Build A Time Machine' which opens with the line "If I have understood correctly, velocity equals the distance travelled divided by time", the beautiful ballad 'Words' which should please all the fans of Darren's 'Truly madly deeply' style ballads, and 'Bombs Up In My Face' which I couldn't explain to you even if I tried. All I can say is... it sounds nothing like him vocally or musically but it is fucking amazing! "The President who fucked the world for every future boy and girl is golfing in Arruba with a suntan and scuba" is one such line from said song.
August 20th is the day the album gets its long awaited release. I expect to be obsessing over the entire project for at least the next twelve months.
In the words of Darren himself, "Who would have thought it could be amazing?"
Even though Darren uses the concept of time machines in songs from his new album, lets escape the past and concentrate on the future - namely Darren's forthcoming 25 track opus 'This Delicate Thing We've Made'. The first single from it is the joyfully titled 'On The Verge Of Something Wonderful' - the video for which you can see below:
Who else could write unique and quirky
lyrics such as "A trip to the dentist, the Hollywood black list"?
This is just one of the gems on what looks certain to be a collection of Darren's strongest material to date! From the nine songs I've heard so far, standouts are the epic sounding 'How To Build A Time Machine' which opens with the line "If I have understood correctly, velocity equals the distance travelled divided by time", the beautiful ballad 'Words' which should please all the fans of Darren's 'Truly madly deeply' style ballads, and 'Bombs Up In My Face' which I couldn't explain to you even if I tried. All I can say is... it sounds nothing like him vocally or musically but it is fucking amazing! "The President who fucked the world for every future boy and girl is golfing in Arruba with a suntan and scuba" is one such line from said song.
August 20th is the day the album gets its long awaited release. I expect to be obsessing over the entire project for at least the next twelve months.
In the words of Darren himself, "Who would have thought it could be amazing?"
Welcome one and... two
If you are reading this, you have either caught me spamming over the Internet... or you know me. If it's the latter, I apologise now.
Anyhoo, welcome to Dazzle Deluxe. In this blog I will be discussing my musings on various subjects of importance... such as music, movies and celebrity!
For now, this is a work of progress but pretty soon it will be the greatest blog, like, ever! Probably.
Hooray!
Anyhoo, welcome to Dazzle Deluxe. In this blog I will be discussing my musings on various subjects of importance... such as music, movies and celebrity!
For now, this is a work of progress but pretty soon it will be the greatest blog, like, ever! Probably.
Hooray!
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